You promoted them because you believed in their potential. Now you’re lying awake wondering if you made a mistake.
Here’s the uncomfortable truth most executives miss: the problem isn’t the person. It’s the relationship between the two of you.
The Hidden Pattern Driving Underperformance
Most leaders think they’re dealing with a performance issue. But underneath it is a cycle that feeds on itself:
- Unspoken disappointment
- Rising anxiety
- Underperformance
- More disappointment
Round and round it goes, each rotation making the next conversation harder to have.
When you work through the Mirror → Ownership → Action framework, that loop breaks. And everything about the relationship starts to feel different.
What Leadership Looks Like on the Other Side
The Tension Drops
Conversations stop feeling coded or high-stakes. You say what you mean. They say what they need. There’s real ownership on both sides instead of careful positioning and defensive maneuvering.
You Stop Being Blindsided
You can see the pattern forming—not just the behavior. You understand what’s driving their hesitation or avoidance. You know how to intervene sooner, before things calcify into something harder to fix.
You Stop Carrying the Dynamic Alone
The relationship shifts from “I need to fix this” to “We’re in this together.” That alone changes the energy you both bring to the work. The weight redistributes. Progress becomes shared.
You Build a Capability You Can Use for the Rest of Your Career
Mirror → Ownership → Action becomes second nature:
- What’s really happening here?
- How am I shaping it?
- What experiment might shift it?
You can apply it to any leader you develop—now or years from now. It becomes part of how you lead.
Your Leadership Reputation Expands
People start seeing you not just as a strong operator but as someone who grows leaders. Senior leaders notice. Peers seek your guidance. Your influence rises in ways that compound over time.
The Real Outcome
This isn’t about becoming a better manager of problems. It’s about becoming a different kind of leader entirely:
- More clarity
- Less tension
- Better relationships
- Better performance
- A grounded confidence in your ability to develop leaders—not give up on them
If you want this to be your leadership reality, not just your aspiration, let’s talk.
